Ready or Not

In less than 48 hours I will be on my way to Africa. Wait, didn't I just get back from somewhere? Well, yes, in fact I did.  And off I go again. I actually just realized yesterday that the trip was only 3 days away, and my immediate thought was, "I am so not ready!" I am so grateful for the amazingly encouraging and wise people around me who have reminded me that this is actually exactly where God wants me. If I'm honest, I still feel completely spent after returning from Mongolia. But then I think of the majority of our team who went back to full-time jobs and families, while I was blessed with time to process and cry and have coffee dates with friends.... and sleep. Even though I had that time, I still feel empty, and not ready to go at it again.

About this time last year, God began teaching me about being prepared in season and out, which I translate as "ready or not, be ready." I think I prefer not "feeling" ready, because I am much more consciously aware of my need to not lean on my own strength, knowledge and abilities. I tend to go to Jesus much quicker and know that I really can't do anything on my own. I also acknowledge that God is really just answering prayers I've been praying since I was little. This is what I've always wanted to do and I'm getting on-the-job training in how to do it completely dependent on Him.

I love Matthew 11:28-30 in the Message version:
"Are you tired?... Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me-watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."

Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I love that. I have a long way to go in that lesson. I know that God gives me the grace to do what He's called me to do, but I have to receive it and rest in it and "learn the unforced rhythm" of it. So ready or not, here I go.

Please keep our team in prayer when you think about it. Say a quick prayer when you read this. We are hoping to do 80 cleft lip surgeries on children and adults in the next 2 weeks. Please pray for logistics, for health, strength and unity for our team. Also for everyone who will be having surgery and their families, and anyone we would come in contact with, that they would see how much God loves them through us.

Adventures Make the Best Memories

Before our team took on Mending week in the hospital back in Ulan Bataar, we ventured out into the southwest Gobi desert, near the Altai mountains, conducting screenings for children with heart defects. This year was the 10th annual screening trip that Dr. Kirk has done with the For Hearts and Souls team. Upon completion of our searching trip this year he finished screening the ENTIRE country of Mongolia, all the while teaching local doctors how to identify these children and refer them for appropriate treatment. Over the last few years there has been a significant decrease in the number of children we find that have not yet been diagnosed, which means that these children are being found and treated, or referred out to other countries as necessary. What a great SUCCESS!

There are so many stories from the week of screening, but I'm only going to highlight one here. Last year our team cared for a young boy during mending week who had multiple complications during and following his heart operation. In the operating room there was concern that he had gone several minutes with very low blood pressure when his heart went into an abnormal rhythm, and then he required electrical pacing to maintain a normal heart rate after the operation because of the extent of his heart defect. Last year he was the kiddo that kept us up all night praying, and the following morning, his heart was functioning well enough to be able to stop using the electrical pacer. He remained in the ICU several days, and then in the hospital for weeks as he recovered. 

We all told him last year that God had a purpose for his life because he had received so many miracles. This year his mom brought him to one of our screenings. I was so surprised when I saw him waiting in line, and he looked so good! We got to talk to them for quite a while and catch up on how he has been doing. Following his discharge from the hospital last year, he remained very weak because his heart rate was still extremely low and he would need a pacemaker. A few months ago, Dr. Bush and Dr. Kirk made a trip to Mongolia for some kids who needed permanent pacemakers placed, and our little guy was one of them. Having a pacemaker totally turned Eggie's life upside down, in a good way :). His mom actually brought him in because she was concerned he was playing too much soccer! He wants to be a doctor when he grows up. As we were talking we found out that both he and his mom had accepted Christ some time in the last few months. At some point during our conversation, mom stepped out and then returned with the dad. She wanted Sara to tell him about Jesus. Sara talked with the father for several minutes and then we all got to pray with him as he chose to accept Christ. I don't know how to put into words the joy that I felt that day getting to see him and his family and know that they are all doing so well.

Here are some more pics from screening week.

I felt so privileged to be a part of this final searching trip with the team. We had so many memorable adventures out under the blue sky of Mongolia. The Russian vans and mini buses we travel in never disappoint in giving us stories to tell.

We took small planes from Ulan Bataar out to Altai where we started our journey in the vans and buses to Ulistai. That first trip took about 8 hours and included 3 breakdowns. During one of those breakdowns, our Mongolian drivers actually disassembled the front end of one of the vans when the stabilizer bar broke. We thought the van would be retired, but the drivers produced a replacement stabilizer bar out of thin air,reassembled the front end, and off we went. Once night fell, our group was close to the ger camp we were supposed to stay in, but the drivers couldn't find their way. There are not exactly street signs in the desert, so once you lose daylight it can be difficult. This place was extremely remote, up and over boulders and rivers, and into the mountains. There are so many stories from breakdowns, to hiking adventures, to claustrophobic vans, to finding our way over boulders in the dark (and narrowly avoiding cliffs because we couldn't see where they were). Ahhhh, the memories! Wouldn't trade them for the world.

If you want to see more scenery pictures and camels and hiking, click here.

Mongolia Mending Week Slideshow

Please, before you watch the slideshow, take time to read the previous post if you haven't already. It will mean so much more if you know what and who you're looking at, and the words of the song will make a lot more sense.

Mountains and Valleys

I was planning on writing my blog post in order of events, but I'm going to go ahead and start with surgery week. Even at this point I don't really know how to articulate what I want to say, but I'm hoping it all makes sense when I'm done.
Our For Hearts and Souls team has been on the mountain tops and down in the valleys over the last 10 days or so. We started the week with Dr Kirk speaking at church from James 1. Little did we know how applicable this would be to our week ahead. I know I'm not the only one who went back to those scriptures a few times during the week. It is so hard during those fiery trials to be intentional about not losing your joy, but that was exactly what we needed. The trials started during our screening week prior to surgeries when customs was giving us a really hard time about releasing all of our supplies. They did finally release everything, but it was a battle. As we began our surgery week, we hit a trial on monday afternoon. A little boy, who we affectionately called "Munk" (and sometimes monkey boy), had several complications during surgery, and at some points things appeared as though they wouldn't end well.  In answer to the many prayers that were being sent up, he improved, made it into the ICU, and when the team arrived the next morning he was awake and off of the ventilator causing trouble :).

Dr. Ariunna and Munk

The next day I had the privilege of recovering a young girl named Ariuka. She has spent all 11 years of her life being blue, almost purple even, because of a heart defect that limits blood flow to her lungs so that she doesn't get enough oxygen. When she came from the OR into the ICU, even all of the team and the Mongolian staff were in shock because she was so pink. The best part of my day was when Dr. Rita brought her mom in and we took her over to her bedside. To see the look on that mom's face when she saw her daughter pink for the first time is one the most amazing things I ever witnessed. Her mom just kept hugging us and saying "hallelujah", "amen", and "Jesus" because it's all the English she knew. At one point, our chaplain, Lloyd came in to pray for Ariuka as he was making his rounds through the ICU. As soon as Lloyd came over and put a hand on the little girl to start to pray, her mom got up, put a hand on her head and started praying over Lloyd in Mongolian. When Ariuka woke up, she kept looking at her hands for a long time. It's almost unbelievable that one small shunt could provide enough blood flow from the heart to the lungs to make a child change colors.

Ariuka and her mom

On wednesday we had a couple of kids that didn't throw us too many surprises. And then came Thursday and a little girl named Ichko. I went back to the hotel Thursday morning to take a nap because I was working that night. When I arrived back at the hospital around lunch time, I passed a team member who told us we needed to pray because the girl who had gone first was not doing well.  At the time I got up to the operating room they had already completed the surgery, but the left side of her heart was not working. During these surgeries the child's heart is stopped and a bypass machine takes over the work of the heart until they complete the surgery. We can't take them off bypass until their heart restarts and is functioning again. The OR team had called for everyone else to come and pray, which was around the time I arrived, so I joined the team that was praying. Our OR team members watched her heart suddenly and dramatically improve while the rest of the team was literally praying down heaven in the room just next door. Her heart function improved enough that they were able to stabilize her by pacing her heart and get her off of bypass and back to the ICU.  She was in critical condition, but alive, and so we set about our night shift not really knowing how it would go. She did become extremely unstable at one point, but with some quick interventions, things leveled out and started improving. By midnight things seemed to be headed in the right direction. By 4 or so in the morning her heart started taking over instead of the pacer doing all the work. We were very literally praying through the darkness and waiting for the sun to rise, and eager for the rest of the team to return to the hospital. As the sun came up that morning, she was doing well enough that we decided to let her wake up and take her off of the breathing machine. To see her open her eyes, breathe on her own, and talk to her mom was a huge relief. (Did I mention that before they were able to get her on bypass in the OR, her heart went into an abnormal rhythm that supplied little blood flow to her brain for several minutes?) When the team arrived, she was sitting up in bed, drinking sips of water, and telling us thank you. There were many tears of joy that day. We watched with our own eyes miracle after miracle happen throughout the week, and several of them happened for Ichko. 

Dr Heather and Dr Minnette watching closely

Me and Ichko in the morning

There was a song we played that morning called "What Faith Can Do" by Kutless. This is the chorus:

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do

And one of the verses:

Don't you give up now
The sun will soon be shining
You gotta face the clouds
To find the silver lining

I've been listening to this song over and over for the last few days and I'm still crying when I listen to it. The words couldn't be more appropriate for all that happened last week. If you haven't heard the whole song, you really should (and you will if you watch the slideshow).

Stick with me, I know this post is getting long, but we still have Friday to go. I slept during the day Friday and when I arrived back at the hospital I received a similar greeting as the previous day; another patient not doing well. This time it was a little 2 year old boy named Ireedui. He had a diagnostic procedure done that afternoon, and in the minutes and hours that followed we knew that things were not good. After ruling out some obvious causes for what was going on, the team doctors came to the conclusion that he had a major stroke, most likely from an air embolus. We knew that without a miracle, this precious boy only had a few days to live. His heart function was already not good because of a very complex heart defect. We spent hours by his bedside that night praying for him and his parents, and trying to keep him comfortable. In the morning when the team arrived we took time to talk and pray, this time having tears of sorrow and grief, knowing his condition had only worsened overnight. He was transferred to another hospital that would be better able to care for him later that day, and after most of us had arrived back home in the states, we received the e-mail none of us wanted to read. Ireedui went to be with Jesus; that was his miracle. There are so many things I don't understand, but I know that God is good and he doesn't change from day to day. He was good on the days where miracles meant that the children lived through their operations, and He's still good when the miracle means that one went home to be with Him. I am certain that Ireedui is pretty happy about it right now. A young man, who is wise beyond his years,  told me in response to this story, "it's awesome to think you were there with him to share God's love and to share peace in a place where none is usually found."

Ireedui

So now I'm home and trying to process all of the ups and downs and crazy extremes of last week. It is amazing how it is so much easier to remember when things went badly, and be discouraged by that, than to remember and focus on all of the great things God has done. For me, I have to be intentional in focusing on the times that God came through in huge ways last week and not let the sadness about  Ireedui overshadow that in any way. There are so many things that God taught me or reinforced in powerful ways this week, but I'll just write a couple here. Complete dependence on Him isn't optional, it's absolutely necessary. We can have all the knowledge and resources available to us, but if the Creator doesn't make that heart beat again it doesn't matter. Spiritual warfare is real. We are not strong enough to fight and win, but God is and He already has. Trusting God and believing that He is who He says is a major key to maintaining joy through the trials. 

If you read the whole thing and didn't give up, I hope that you were encouraged. Enjoy the slideshow on the next post.